How to improve SDSU football’s snoozer of a promo schedule

San Diego State football doesn’t often use fan giveaways as a marketing tool. I have a replica Kirk Morrison jersey somewhere and think I got a hat once or twice. If anything, it’s usually some garbage like a poster, magnet or key fob.

So it comes as no surprise that this year’s promotional schedule continues the tradition. There’s not a single thing listed as a giveaway, just a bunch of military appreciation nights, teacher recognition awards and whatnot. We would like to think that with some creativity, passion and a bit more cash, Aztec football’s promotional events could actually be a draw.

Here’s the 2018 promo schedule as it is, and maybe how it could be.

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Climb out from your bunker: Jalen McDaniels withdraws from NBA Draft

After taking us all on a month-long emotional roller coaster ride in which every invite to a team workout and every Twitter avatar change became a reason for panic, Jalen McDaniels is coming back for his sophomore season at San Diego State.

In an extremely SDSU student move, McDaniels waited until the last moment to complete his assignment, announcing his withdrawal from the NBA Draft with barely an hour to go before the deadline. Been there, man.

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The Aztec Warrior lives on, for now

The Aztec Warrior — either a source of school pride or a demeaning colonial relic, depending on your bent — is staying at San Diego State University.

Until the next inevitable flare-up, anyway.

Responding to a University Senate vote last fall to retire the former “Monty Montezuma” mascot, do away with violent imagery such as the spear-festooned “DS” logo and examine the appropriateness of the Aztecs moniker, president Sally Roush today announced the following decisions:

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Meet Malachi Flynn, SDSU’s newest splashy hoops commit

Remember Malachi Flynn? You probably used to know him as that evil jerkface who ruined your Sunday night a few months back. Last November, Flynn tormented San Diego State by absolutely balling out in the final of the Wooden Legacy Tournament, scoring 24 points to secure a Washington State win and the tournament MVP. Classic evil jerkface move tbh.

So, uh, it seems we may need to reconsider any snap opinions we formed that night. Today, Malachi Flynn is a gentleman, a scholar and an Aztec.

Following in the transfer footsteps of Xavier Thames, the sharpshooting guard committed to SDSU where he’ll have two seasons of eligibility remaining. With Devin Watson and Jeremy Hemsley both seniors, 2019-20 will almost certainly be the Malachi Flynn show on Montezuma Mesa.

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Aztecs beat out Shockers for sought-after 2018 hoops recruit

It has been a trying couple of weeks around the SDSU basketball program with longtime coaches defecting to rivals, a former signee deciding he didn’t want to pump his own gas anymore and the team’s star player out testing the NBA waters.

What we need is some unambiguously good hoops news, dammit.

Ah. Yes, that will do.

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Seahawks draft Rashaad Penny 27th overall, completely blow minds

What do you call it when something good happens? Like, something that’s not the bad or mediocre thing you suspected would happen? I’m having a hard time even processing the reality that Rashaad Penny is a Seahawk. This is my face:

Edward Louis Severson III, exultant.

As we all know, Penny is a person of high character and a hell of a running back. The Seahawks are a running team that really needs a running back!

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Justin Hutson earns long-overdue head coaching position, commits vile treason

Remember a few weeks ago when Fresno State’s men’s basketball coach got poached by UTEP and we all laughed and laughed? Seriously … UTEP! The one in El Paso!

Well it’s not so funny anymore, is it?*

Congrats?

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Max Montana to look fabulous in Europe next year, not San Diego

Farewell to Max Montana, the streakiest, stylin’-est shooter San Diego State men’s basketball has ever known.

Montana, who is graduating this summer despite one year of eligibility remaining, plans to hoop professionally in the European Union, where he can already work legally. He should do well there, both on the court where his versatile game should translate, and in the continent’s many bastions of sophisticated style and culture. Lord knows his wardrobe is ready.

You know … everyone assumes Max is going to go play in Germany, because of his family roots, but I’m thinking Milan.

Or Ibiza. Does Ibiza have a team?

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