Justin Hutson earns long-overdue head coaching position, commits vile treason

Remember a few weeks ago when Fresno State’s men’s basketball coach got poached by UTEP and we all laughed and laughed? Seriously … UTEP! The one in El Paso!

Well it’s not so funny anymore, is it?*

Congrats?

Continue reading “Justin Hutson earns long-overdue head coaching position, commits vile treason”

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Max Montana to look fabulous in Europe next year, not San Diego

Farewell to Max Montana, the streakiest, stylin’-est shooter San Diego State men’s basketball has ever known.

Montana, who is graduating this summer despite one year of eligibility remaining, plans to hoop professionally in the European Union, where he can already work legally. He should do well there, both on the court where his versatile game should translate, and in the continent’s many bastions of sophisticated style and culture. Lord knows his wardrobe is ready.

You know … everyone assumes Max is going to go play in Germany, because of his family roots, but I’m thinking Milan.

Or Ibiza. Does Ibiza have a team?

Continue reading “Max Montana to look fabulous in Europe next year, not San Diego”

Jalen McDaniels dips toe in NBA waters, will probably (hopefully?) return

Jalen McDaniels will absolutely play for the San Diego State men’s basketball team next season. Definitely. Probably.

/bites fingernails down to bloody nubs

Continue reading “Jalen McDaniels dips toe in NBA waters, will probably (hopefully?) return”

Game Recap: Aztecs lose heartbreaker in NCAA Tournament, yet our hearts grow fonder

The bun of your tormentor.

This one is going to sting for a while.

The San Diego State men’s basketball team lost their first-round NCAA Tournament game to the Houston Cougars on a frustrating, baffling, thrilling and heartbreaking night in Wichita, Kansas by a final score of 67-65.

Continue reading “Game Recap: Aztecs lose heartbreaker in NCAA Tournament, yet our hearts grow fonder”

Pride, nostalgia, passion, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea, hope: A Las Vegas weekend recap

I was going to write this either way. Win or lose.

Every year in March I go to the Mountain West Conference Basketball tournament in Las Vegas. My friends and I always have a good time drinking excessively, gambling recklessly and acting obnoxiously as we cheer for San Diego State. It makes for decent #content and is a nice way for me to recap the weekend as I pound kale smoothies on the following Monday, desperately trying to apologize to my body for the hell I put it through.

(You can read about last year’s trip here.)

But before we get to this past weekend, let’s go back a few months to the beginning of the 2017-18 basketball season. After three straight years of significant regression, I implored the SDSU basketball team to “Teach me to love again.

When this season began in November, I could barely get myself excited enough to read a Mark Zeigler practice update (which is good because he blocked me on Twitter so I don’t know when they’re posted anyway). But here we are in March, and folks, I AM EXTREMELY BACK.

Continue reading “Pride, nostalgia, passion, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea, hope: A Las Vegas weekend recap”

Selection Sunday: Aztecs going to Wichita, play Houston in NCAA first round

Mrs. and Mr. Stripe in happier times.

I’m going to Wichita!
far from this opera for evermore
I’m gonna work the straw
make the sweat drip out of every pore
– The White Stripes, “Seven Nation Army”

When the San Diego State men’s basketball team settled in to watch the NCAA Tournament selection show, they surely were happy to go anywhere — except Dayton — and play anybody. After slow-rolling the reveal, TBS’ Ernie Johnson finally announced the Mountain West champs’ destination: Wichita, Kansas, to play the 21st-ranked Houston Cougars this Thursday at 4:20 PM (seriously).

via TBS

Continue reading “Selection Sunday: Aztecs going to Wichita, play Houston in NCAA first round”

Game Recap: Aztecs redeem season to nowhere, punch tickets to NCAA Tournament

Screenshot 2018-03-10 at 5.25.02 PM
Never in doubt.

One month ago, Brian Dutcher was a lousy hire. He was in over his head and had obviously lost the locker room. All was lost. #FIREDUTCHER

About that.

Lest you think this is some kind of self-satisfied blog version of a subtweet, here’s some Valentine’s Day snark from yours truly which I will now officially own up to.

Nice tweet, dipshit.

One month ago, Trey Kell was a tragic story. The San Diego native was a key part of a vaunted recruiting class that disappointed, producing diminishing returns every single season. The tragedy was capped with a cruel senior campaign that saw him injured and sick and injured again.

About that.

Today, the first-year head coach and the hometown senior capped off one of the most stirring comeback stories in San Diego State sports history, beating the New Mexico Lobos in an excruciating-thrilling-horrible-wonderful 82-75 come-from-behind victory in the Mountain West Tournament title game in Vegas. The Aztecs will go to the NCAA Tournament for the first time in three seasons thanks to an improbable nine-game winning streak that had the kind of redemption arcs you only see in sports movies where the main character is a golden retriever or a field goal kicking mule.

I am, as the kids say, shook.

And it feels fucking incredible.

Continue reading “Game Recap: Aztecs redeem season to nowhere, punch tickets to NCAA Tournament”

Game Recap: Aztecs mercilessly pummel Nevada, reach tournament final

nevada
Schadenfreude courtesy @CT2SD.

Back  when things looked bleak for San Diego State men’s basketball, I would often try to break up all the bitter text in my grim recaps with a few visual aids. One of my favorite crutches was the win probability chart, because, hey, why expend brainpower writing angry words about another brutal loss when you can let a line graph tell the grim tale for you.

Anyway, here is what those charts looked like back then.

Say, would you like to see the win probability chart for the Aztecs’ Mountain West Conference semifinal game against the University of Nevada-Reno on Thursday night?

That is not a graph, that is pornography. That is exactly the kind of dangerous smut the Kansas City Royals were trying to warn us about  and you should probably clear your browser’s search history immediately.

Continue reading “Game Recap: Aztecs mercilessly pummel Nevada, reach tournament final”