What follows is a caustic précis of football results from the inferior athletic conference the San Diego State Aztecs play in. Let’s see what in the Sam Hill those middling teams did this week:
Hawai’i 34, AF 27 (2 OT)
I have seen not a single frame of Rainbow or Falcon football this year but am nonetheless gobsmacked by this result. This football score physically strikes me in the mouth. After the Rainbows lost at home to sad-sack UNLV last week I assumed they were done, which is evidently wrong. AF shanked a short game-winning FG in regulation.
Airing it out: Air Force rushed for 389 yards, with one completion and one INT on 10 pass attempts.
Colorado State 42, UNLV 23
CSU led the Rebs 35-0 at halftime and easily won a football game at Sam Boyd Stadium in unincorporated Clark County, Nevada. The former Silver Bowl is an even hollower shell of its former self, which wasn’t very good either.
Vegas baby, Vegas: The air temperature was 90 F at kickoff (2:38 PM Pacific). The announced attendance of 18,362 is a lie.
New Mexico 59, Louisiana-Monroe 17
I wanted to complain that New Mexico gets to beat up on Sun Belt lightweight LAMON, but South Alabama is 0-4 in the same conference.
Howler: First two-game win streak for the Lobos since November 2015. That’s bad.
Wyoming 42, Nevada-Reno 34
WYO keeps putting up points and conference Ws, remaining Boise’s only real competition in the Mtn-Mtn division. The Aztecs play at Reno and Laramie in consecutive road games next month.
WY not: The Cowboys rushed for 401 yards. Nevada is 122nd in rushing defense, 7th worst in FBS.
Utah State 38, Fresno State 20
The Aggies led throughout in their familiar Logan environs and comfortably put away a truly bad Bulldogs team, losers of six straight. Fresno fired head coach Tim DeRuyter the morning after the game.
Deseret news: In 1892 the Utah State Agriculturalists beat the University of Utah 12-0 in the first football game and intercollegiate athletic event for both schools.
San Diego State 42, SJST 3 (Friday)
The Aztecs crushed the overmatched Spartans, leveling the all-time series at 19-19-2 (read our recap). SDSU and San José State have played intermittently since 1935 at Spartan Stadium, Aztec Bowl, Balboa Stadium and the Q. We can’t shake these lunkheads.
Little help: Despite another dominating in-conference performance (they covered the -23 point spread by 16) the Aztecs somehow LOST one of their three AP Top 25 votes, languishing in the Others Receiving Votes ghetto with the web ads. The poll is bad and wrong.
I am unmoved by your nasal strap/heeled footwear/Goldie Hawn content, Taboola.
Boise State 28, BYU 27 (Thursday)
BYU had a 44-yard field goal blocked in the final seconds and the Broncos held serve at home to remain undefeated. This is the desired result in a quantitative sense, and objectively good because BYU losing can’t be a bad thing. Our flickering dreams of playing in January are predicated on beating a ranked Boise team in the MW championship on their smurf turf. That seems like a tough game! It’s the game we need.
No Code: I am genuinely creeped out by BYU’s whole deal.
Other notable results:
Houston and South Florida lost, thereby falling out of the Group of Five New Year’s Six chase. This new bowl projection from Jerry Palm tantalizes with a rosy outlook for our heroes:
One hardly need point out that the Aztecs playing Tennessee in the Cotton Bowl on January 2 (a holiday, since New Year’s Day falls on a Sunday) would be by far the biggest game in school history.
Cal beat Oregon in OT, so at least they’re on track to be bowl eligible.
NEXT WEEK in the Mountain West:
The Aztecs play a road game while the other teams also play intercollegiate football. Games:
San Diego State at Utah State (Friday 5 p.m. CBSSN) – SDSU leads the all-time series 11-1 but haven’t visited the former Romney Stadium since 1975. Utah State and San José are only in the conference because San Diego State and Boise were leaving it.
Air Force at Fresno State (Friday) – Are you a Fresno alum? Would you like to be an interim head coach?
Boise State at Wyoming – Battle for the Mountain-Mountain. WYO could throw a wrench into our candy-ass Cotton Bowl hopes. Boise to Laramie isn’t terribly far as the crow flies, but they’re oceans apart philosophically.
UNLV at San José State – I honestly wish they just didn’t play this game.
New Mexico at Hawai’i – [statement on colonialism redacted]
Colorado State and Nevada are idle this week, stoic and meditative in respite.