What: No. 19 San Diego State Aztecs vs. UNLV Rebels
When: Saturday, October 7 at 7:45 p.m.
Line: Aztecs -9.5
What can you say?
We’re playing it straight this week. While we’re usually here to act like dipshits AND inform (yours truly leaning HEAVILY into the dipshit portion), what happened in Vegas this week requires we put on our adult pants and act right. So as much fun as we have going in on UNLV alum and human FryDaddy Guy Fieri, now is not the time.
Unless you only go for industry conventions or some such (LOL NERD), you go to Vegas to blow off whatever amount of steam you need to blow off. Tables, booze, naked folks, professional naked folks, conference tournaments, video games, “Backdoor beauty?”, the buffet at Westward Ho (RIP), a store just for M&Ms. Fifty eight people were murdered, almost 500 people were physically injured, and an untold number of victims will carry around mental scars for years because some maniac wanted to make them pay for having a good time. Or some other stupid reason. Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Nothing will justify/explain it to a rational mind. Just know we love you, Las Vegas.
Why should we be scared of them?
Should we be scared of a team that lost to their FCS cupcake opponent?
Do they have anyone worth watching?
Junior running back Lexington Thomas has a name straight out of porn and 8.4 yards per-attempt to match. That’s good enough to *gasp* LEAD the Mountain West. Yes, his 571 yards is well behind Penny’s 823, but he’s gaining almost a yard and a half more than Penny every time he touches the ball. If you’re surpassing Rashaad Penny in some way, you’re doing something right.
Why should we hate them?
Nothing but love for you this week, Vegas.
Do they have any famous alumni we can make fun of?
Will we beat them?
Yeah, the Aztecs are just the better team. Simple as that. 33-16