The key takeaway from San Diego State’s thrilling 80-42 exhibition victory over Cal-State San Marcos

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Hawai’i Five Five-Oh

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San Diego State’s tear through the Mountain West Conference over the past two seasons has been well-documented. The winning streak is up to 17. The point differential in five games this season is plus-154.

And Saturday evening, before a homecoming crowd of more than 41,000, the Aztecs might have achieved their most impressive and thorough torching of the MWC dumpster. Facing Hawai’i, a team widely considered the least bad of the absolutely putrid West Division, SDSU won 55-0 and clinched at least a tie for the division title.

Fifty-five to nothing.

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The key takeaway from San Diego State’s thrilling 76-63 exhibition victory over UC San Diego

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Aztecs survive scary trap game by killing Utah State to death

All the elements of a classic trap game were in place. A road game. An opponent that was probably better than its record showed. Elevation (4,534′). A driving rainstorm. A lethargic start and an early deficit.

Admit it, you where worried about this game when Utah State scored on its first drive. Hell I was worried about this game when I woke up this morning.

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My imaginary friend Admiral Ackbar Gbaja-Biamila

Yet here we are hours later, basking in the most complete display of San Diego State dominance since … what … last year’s Hawaii Bowl? The Aztecs hammered Utah State 40-13 on Friday night, and they did so despite the hostile crowd of grizzled survivalists in the stands. Despite the elevation (4,534′). Despite the fact that the game was being played in a damn pineapple under the sea.

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Aztecs win bigly against worst team they’ve played in nearly a week

Seeing as we’ve become a fanbase of insufferable, entitled greed pigs, there has been some hand-wringing of late about how we haven’t been beating inferior Mountain West competition by nearly enough.

Happy now, jackals?

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Pumphrey, defense lead to retention of modestly-priced vintage petroleum receptacle

There reaches a point when you witness excellence long enough that you become numb to it. From the perspective of a seasoned D.J. Pumphrey watcher like me, tonight didn’t really feel like the kind of dazzling performance we’ll be recounting years from now. There were no 75-yard touchdown sprints down the sideline or 50-yard bursts up the gut. In fact, his biggest gainer was a mere 22 yards.

Then you look at the stats and see Pumphrey went for 220 yards and two scores. It’s then that you can realize what spoiled twits we are to not be in total awe.

I mean:

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Aztecs look like the Aztecs, beat UNLV

For one night at least, we can breathe easier. In a 26-7 victory over UNLV on Saturday night at Qualcomm, the Aztecs signaled that whatever ailed them over the previous six-plus quarters of garbage football wasn’t necessarily a permanent state. Or, at the very least, it wasn’t so bad that it would prevent them from drilling MWC West patsies with ease.

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Why can’t we have nice things?

If you read this blog regularly, you know I’m a positive fella who likes finding the good in everything. So before we dig into SDSU’s 42-24 loss at South Alabama – a nobody Sun Belt team that is now officially our daddy – let’s look for silver linings! Hey, I just thought of a few:

  • It only gets easier from here as there are no invincible Sun Belt titans left on the schedule.
  • We can officially stop giving a crap about how Cal or Houston or Western Michigan do.
  • SDSU probably wasn’t going to a New Year’s Six bowl no matter what.
  • I like listening to The Smiths in the dark, and I’m now inspired to do so.
  • That No. 19 ranking made us look like conceited braggarts.
  • Last time the Aztecs were ranked, it lasted only one week before they lost to a garbage team. Thanks to a bye, this year’s ranking lasted three calendar weeks!
  • The Big 12 wasn’t watching anyway.
  • You’ll have plenty of space to toss around the old pigskin in the Qualcomm parking lot on Saturday. Lotsa elbow room, yessir.
  • Grim death stalks us all, and looms closer than you think.

SEE! It really wasn’t so bad! Oh god no

Continue reading “Why can’t we have nice things?”