When I first started writing about the Aztecs in 2011, the Mountain West Conference blogosphere was a sad, dark place. One bright beacon in the wilderness was One Bronco Nation Under God, a group of pretty cool, funny dudes who probably all smell like criss-cut French fries in real life.
I had misgivings about this game from the start. San Diego State had traveled to a wounded but proud city to play a team inspired to honor its fallen friends and neighbors. A win here wasn’t going to feel good, no matter what.
Then the game started and my misgivings mounted. The Aztecs opened with a methodical drive that stalled at the 1 when Rashaad Penny stunningly fumbled a pitch. SDSU forced a three and out and promptly marched back down inside the 10 … only to settle for the field goal.
Total domination, and a 3 point lead.
That start was the college football version of picking up a hitchhiker on a lonely highway in a horror movie. You just knew by the end of the game, we were going to be staggering for shelter toward a creepy, half-collapsed barn and … oh no, no, NO … don’t go in there! This is baaaaaad!
And then the Aztecs beat UNLV 41-10.
I’m starting to think maybe I shouldn’t worry so much about this team.
One week ago tonight, the Aztecs delivered a huge comeback win against Stanford that we all replayed in our heads and on all our various devices for the entire week. That game was awesome.
Tonight, the Aztecs delivered a huge comeback win against Air Force that I now wish to scrub from my memory using one of those Men In Black neuralyzer things. That game was horrible and can go screw itself.
One of the best things about having Rocky Long coach of your favorite football team (besides, you know, the winning) is how meme-worthy he is. Rocky has a colorful, unconventional personality, as was on display in his incredible postgame comments about The Blackout.
My blog cohorts and me are gleeful purveyors of these dankest of dank memes. For example:
- Rocky Long believes in nothing.
- Rocky Long is a grizzled survivalist.
- Rocky Long owns several classic cars, some of which are not on blocks
These are all very good, mostly because they seem to contain kernels of truth gleaned from Long’s public persona. But the best Rocky Long meme out there is one this humble blog cannot take credit for. It’s this:
Rocky Long hates America.
These truly are the dog days of summer for the Alumni Report. Hoops is over, NFL camps haven’t yet begun and our #AztecForLife mayor hasn’t even been publicly humiliated in weeks! What is there to talk about?
Fortunately, we have our trusty SDSU basebros to carry us through.
What follows is a list of things that went poorly in San Diego State’s 60-57 loss at Air Force on Tuesday night:
- Malik Pope broke again and may be out for a spell.
- SDSU blew a 14-point lead and lost a game it trailed for, like, two minutes.
- The team the Aztecs lost to is real bad, even when adjusting for Mountain West.
- The Aztecs keep shooting 3s like that is a thing they can do (note: they cannot).
- SDSU fell to 0-5 in close games this season, which … man.
- Jeremy Hemsley and Trey Kell and Zylan Cheatham, generally.
Now, in the interest of providing alternative facts, here are some things that went well tonight:
San Diego State’s two marquee sports programs were both on the floor at Viejas Arena on Saturday afternoon. The Aztecs football team, fresh off a gut-check victory in the Mountain West title game, was there to take a victory lap and soak up deserved applause at halftime. The Aztecs men’s basketball team, fresh off road losses to Loyola Chicago and Grand Canyon, was there to get run by a trash Pac-12 team amid a chorus of boos.
At this point, I can think of only one thing the two squads have in common: Both teams will play their next meaningful game in Las Vegas.