Game Recap: Aztecs hammer UNLV by 38 points LOL

There are two ways to look at what transpired Saturday afternoon at Viejas Arena, where the San Diego State men’s basketball team crushed UNLV 94-56 in what felt like a November paycheck game against a Southland Conference team that starts a 6-foot-5 power forward wearing a headband and goggles.

On one hand, you’d be forgiven if you came away a little bitter.

Where the hell has this been? That aggressive defense, that commitment to doing something on offense besides jacking threes, that perfect use of the bench. If SDSU stated playing like that a couple of months ago we’d be talking about NCAA Tournament seeding rather than the thrilling quest to avoid the conference tournament play-in round.

On the other hand, LOLOLOLOL eat it UNLV.

The Aztecs just rained merciless destruction on one of our most hated rivals, delivering the biggest beating ever in this series. Keep in mind, that spans 69 games and includes several seasons in the ’90s when SDSU was seriously putrid. The Rebels are probably hitchhiking back to Vegas right now while Malik Pope joyrides their team bus through Pacific Beach. At least I hope so.

Yeah, I’m feeling like going with option No. 2 here. Today was awesome, so I say let’s sit back, relax and enjoy the following video of SDSU beating UNLV with a pillowcase full of doorknobs, metaphorically. Mostly metaphorically.

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Game Recap: Dutch discovers bench players, Aztecs win

Another day passed without the Yellowstone Caldera exploding in a supervolcanic eruption and altering life on earth. Good thing, because San Diego State beat Wyoming 87-77 in a men’s basketball game tonight. Those Cowboys have enough to worry about!

Solid bench

I was obligated otherwise during this game, however reports indicate Aztecs head coach Brian Dutcher read all our tweets and was compelled to finally to give under-appreciated Nolan Narain some real minutes. And hells bells Narain was real good, making 8 of 10 shots for a career-high 18 points in just 18 minutes. Scoring a point per minute is excellent.

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Game Recap: Aztecs beat another terrible Mountain West team which is great I suppose

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Give the Aztecs this: They’ve got the whole “beating the tar out of terrible conference opponents” thing down to a science.

The San Diego State men’s basketball team crushed Air Force 81-50 on Saturday night at Viejas in the kind of beating it usually dispenses to the likes of San Diego Christian or McCheese McNeese State. The stat of the game tonight was 3 — the number of minutes played by SDSU walk-on Michael Sohikish.

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Game Recap: Aztecs blow another late lead, lose to New Mexico whoop whoop

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UNM fans attempt to storm the court after the Lobos’ win at the Pit.

I went into this game promising myself I wasn’t going to care about the outcome. Not after this week, when the San Diego State men’s basketball team suffered a loss to Fresno State so demoralizing it immediately changed the topic of conversation among the fans from “can SDSU play its way onto the bubble?” to “are Brian Dutcher’s players subtweeting him?”

Who was I kidding? It wasn’t going to last.

A couple of things quickly snapped me out of my apathy as I dug into the Woodstock’s pizza that acted as my CBS Sports Network subscription for the evening.

The first was that the Aztecs actually showed up motivated and with a plan, attacking the basket and dominating the paint to build a first half lead of as many as 13, and a halftime advantage of 10.

The second was … well …

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Game Recap Express: Aztecs crush Spartans with nasty second half

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I just got home from attending the San Diego State men’s basketball game, which the Aztecs won by 36 points against a putrid San Jose State team with three wins to its name. It’s super late thanks to the CBS Sports Network mandated 8 p.m. start, and I have to get up early tomorrow to fight through another rainy commute full of standing water and spun-out Acuras on the 8.

As such, I’m going to set my time limit on writing this recap at one hour.

OK. Start the countdown … now!

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Jalen McDaniels awesome, Aztecs good enough to outlast Colorado State

Happy New Year! On the second day of this Gregorian calendar year 2018, the San Diego State men’s basketball Aztecs beat the Colorado State Rams 77-68 in Fort Collins, Colorado, town of backward-ass bumpkins, elevation 4,982 feet.

I caught glimpses and overheard fleeting commentary of this one while making a salad, a cocktail, a phone call and sitting for dinner with a friend. 2018 is a Tomorrowland year in roboto font, everything is digitized and dystopic, the future careens unstoppable toward us all. Save yourselves! Become a vegan. Put all your money in cryptocurrencies. Build your bunker now. In the meantime, here’s some things about a basketball game:

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Game Recap: SDSU, Max Montana get back on track against Aggies

What the San Diego State men’s basketball team desperately needed after the ugliness in Laramie earlier this week was a cakewalk. Well, on Saturday night at Viejas Arena, dessert was served.

cake

Is that not a scoreboard?

Yes that is a scoreboard.

And is that not a 79?

Yes that is a 79?

And is that not a 59?

Yes that is a 59.

And is that not the winning team?

Yes that is the winning team.

And is this not a gimmicky way to fill space in a post about an SDSU win that really wasn’t all that interesting?

Yes that is a wait … hang on … what?

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Game Recap: Aztecs lose to UC Stinkin’ Berkeley

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It all came down to one final shot — an off-balance prayer that had the entire city of San Diego on the edge of its collective seat. The attempt was true, rattling home and sending the raucous crowd at Viejas Arena into hysterics.

Unreal.

Red Panda had done it.

Five bowls, flipped onto her head from atop a god damn unicycle.

Savor the moment, SDSU men’s basketball fans. Because Red Panda’s halftime show Saturday was the closest thing to national relevance that we’ll get to experience for the rest of the regular season.

The Aztecs suffered a last-second 63-62 home loss to a brutally bad Cal team, essentially changing the font on their NCAA tournament resume to Comic Sans.

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