AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: Terrible news for Neeks, Reed gets traded, Maal gets paid

Can you believe it? August just started and football is already crushing our damn souls. Yesterday, we got some news out of Baltimore Ravens camp about rookie Nico Siragusa and it was not good. It was quite awful, actually!

That is absolutely devastating for Siragusa, who signed a 4-year, $3 million deal in May. Of course, because the NFL is basically the devil, that money is not guaranteed. Fortunately, he did bank a $620,000 signing bonus, so not all is lost. But man. First training camp and this happens?

Get well soon, Nico. We’ll all be pulling for you.

Continue reading “AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: Terrible news for Neeks, Reed gets traded, Maal gets paid”

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AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: DJ Pumphrey is going to be in a thing called a ‘pony set’ which is somehow even sexier than it sounds

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The Philadelphia Eagles have some big plans for Donnel Pumphrey. It seems the rookie is going to be utilized in something called a “pony set”.


A PONY. SET. FOLKS.

/fans self

Continue reading “AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: DJ Pumphrey is going to be in a thing called a ‘pony set’ which is somehow even sexier than it sounds”

AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: The Golden State Warriors are history’s greatest monsters

The Golden State Warriors want me dead. They tried to kill me through mind-numblingly inept and boring basketball when I was teenager in the Bay Area in the 1990s. Fortunately, I managed to survive those bleak years of Donyell Marshall and Todd Fuller by developing a lifelong apathy toward the NBA.

Naturally, now that I’ve been shaken from my apathy by a San Diego State alumnus achieving superstar status, the Warriors are coming for my ass again.

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AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: North County erects statue to an Aztec legend and it’s somehow not Tom Craft (?)

Your weekly roundup of SDSU alumni in the ranks of professional sports or wherever:

Tony Gwynn statue
The Tony Gwynn statue has arrived in Poway.

I have no joke for this; it’s just v. cool and good.

Continue reading “AZTECS ALUMNI REPORT: North County erects statue to an Aztec legend and it’s somehow not Tom Craft (?)”

Other pictures of people in hats that will offend and disgust you

Last night, Aztecs Twitter had a near meltdown and it had nothing to do with the embarrassing hoops loss to Fresno State. Nope, it seems Donnel Pumphrey wore a ballcap to the basketball game.

Prepare to clutch your pearls.

Some people got really mad about this! Mad enough to furiously @ him to the point where THE NEXT DAY Pumphrey still felt the need to defend  himself on Instagram. Seriously, people, what are we doing here?

My take is that D.J. is an SDSU legend and he can wear whatever gosh darn hat he wishes. He owes us no apologies or explanations and we should like it or lump it and, either way, keep our opinions to ourselves. And the guy writing this? He’s a Giants fan* who thinks that hat is pure trash woven by demons in the depths of hell.

Anyway, to take some heat off of Pumphrey, I’ve decided to present some photos of SDSU and SDSU-related people wearing hats that will make you EVEN MADDER! Here goes.

Continue reading “Other pictures of people in hats that will offend and disgust you”

So you wasted your Wednesday night

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Here are a few things you could have been watching at 8 p.m. on Wednesday night instead of the San Diego State men’s basketball team’s 63-55 home loss to Fresno State.

ABC: The Goldbergs
“So Swayze It’s Crazy”

After Adam sees his friend on television, he asks Beverly for her help to become an actor, so Beverly enlists his friend’s mom Edie, who is a kid talent agent in town. Unfortunately, Edie insists Adam can only get “nerd” roles, so Beverly goes on a quest to make Adam a teenage heartthrob. Meanwhile, Barry decides to embrace the punk lifestyle, and Murray attempts to become more involved in Erica’s life, but it backfires.

This definitely does not seem like a television show that traffics in cheap stereotypes, no sir. Let’s see, what else?

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Didn’t make the trip to Vegas? Here’s what you missed

 

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HOLY SHIT WE REALLY WON THAT GAME

Sorry, I just got home from Vegas three days ago and am still adjusting to normal life, where drinking while crossing the street is frowned upon and $25 is a measurable amount of money and basic human dignity exists.

But forget about the debauchery and the [NUMBER REDACTED] dollars I lost at video roulette. The Aztecs won a game! On national TV! Against a really good team! And set some insane records! What even is life as an Aztec fan right now?

Let’s start at the beginning.

Continue reading “Didn’t make the trip to Vegas? Here’s what you missed”

The Pumphrey years at SDSU: A retrospective in tweet form

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52 months ago, Donnel Pumphrey pulled out his DROID RAZR MAXX and composed the following message.

Zero people favorited this tweet at the time. Feel free to go back and like it now, though. I’ll wait.

Continue reading “The Pumphrey years at SDSU: A retrospective in tweet form”