The Golden State Warriors want me dead. They tried to kill me through mind-numblingly inept and boring basketball when I was teenager in the Bay Area in the 1990s. Fortunately, I managed to survive those bleak years of Donyell Marshall and Todd Fuller by developing a lifelong apathy toward the NBA.
Naturally, now that I’ve been shaken from my apathy by a San Diego State alumnus achieving superstar status, the Warriors are coming for my ass again.
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