Armed Forces Bowl Recap: Penny’s epic swan song wasted in stupid loss to Army

San Diego State football has given its fans so much these past seven seasons; things that we never dared imagine a decade ago. Seven bowl appearances. Four wins vs. Pac-12 teams, including three in a row. Appearances in the rankings and the expectation that the Aztecs should be nationally respectable every single year.

Saturday, San Diego State football decided to give some stuff away. The Armed Forces Bowl. A potential Top-25 ranking. A storybook ending to Rashaad Penny’s incredible Aztecs career.

IT WAS NOT PARTICULARLY ENJOYABLE.

Fuckin’ ay, DJ. Fuckin’. Ay.

Army beat the Aztecs 42-35, the final score owing to some final play silliness. But really it was a two-point conversion capping off a 5-minute drive that gave the Black Knights the 1-point winning margin. It was a methodical, excruciating, seemingly inevitable go-ahead TD march.

One that never should have been allowed to occur.

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Game Recap: Aztecs trample San Jose State underfoot

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I bet you didn’t even know Nick Bawden used to be a quarterback until you heard about it on the broadcast. Crazy, right??

The night began with Rashaad Penny doing Rashaad Penny things. It continued with Juwan Washington running to daylight and Nick Bawden soaring into the end zone like a majestic, hella jacked eagle. It ended with Chase Jasmin, Tyler Wormhoudt and someone named Chad Woolsey (possibly a cop or an undercover reporter working on a story about dating mores in college) busting off big runs of their own.

I mean, my god. One wonders if offensive coordinator Jeff Horton considered getting John Baron or Antonio Rosales a couple of carries, just to see what the hell would happen*.

The San Diego State football team beat San Jose State 52-7 on Saturday night in San Jose, to finally take the all-time series lead in the vaunted El Camino Real Rivalry. And, honestly, the 52 points scored was one of the more underwhelming stats of the game.

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Aztecs return to the Tombstone for the scrimmagiest of scrimmages

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Bend the knee.

Two weeks from the opener and in the wake of the Great Chickenpox Panic of 2017, the San Diego State fanfest/scrimmage/infectious disease quarantine saw the Black Team beat the Red Team 27-6 on Saturday.

Wait. Or was it the Red Team that won?

And why wasn’t the Red Team wearing red?

I don’t know the answer to either of these questions, and I’m actually OK with embracing the mystery here so don’t bother telling me.

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Aztecs survive scary trap game by killing Utah State to death

All the elements of a classic trap game were in place. A road game. An opponent that was probably better than its record showed. Elevation (4,534′). A driving rainstorm. A lethargic start and an early deficit.

Admit it, you where worried about this game when Utah State scored on its first drive. Hell I was worried about this game when I woke up this morning.

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My imaginary friend Admiral Ackbar Gbaja-Biamila

Yet here we are hours later, basking in the most complete display of San Diego State dominance since … what … last year’s Hawaii Bowl? The Aztecs hammered Utah State 40-13 on Friday night, and they did so despite the hostile crowd of grizzled survivalists in the stands. Despite the elevation (4,534′). Despite the fact that the game was being played in a damn pineapple under the sea.

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