Game Recap: Aztecs stun No. 12 Gonzaga, you, me, everyone else

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The court storming was denied, with extreme prejudice.

As the final tenth of a second ticked off in the San Diego State men’s basketball team’s 72-70 upset of No. 12 Gonzaga on Thursday night at Viejas, a couple dozen scruffy students made a run at a handful of Elite Security’s finest. The wave was repulsed, with one particularly rambunctious student getting hauled away into the tunnel by the enraged off-brand Pinkertons.

It was honestly kind of a shame. If ever there was a game that deserved a court storming — a sweet release of two and a half years of unrealized expectations and general malaise — this was it.

The Aztecs didn’t beat just any ranked opponent. This was Mark Few’s mid-major blue blood, a reloaded squad that returned two key starters off a team that was 7 points shy of the National Damn Championship just a few months ago. This is easily SDSU’s most significant regular season win since Kansas at Phog Allen in 2014. And unlike that time, I don’t think any of us really saw it coming.

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Game Recap: Welcome, ‘Matt Mitchell’

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Matt Mitchell showed up out of the blue in the middle of summer, a late commitment that took a lot of people by surprise. The Riverside native is 6-foot-6, 230 and sports a well-groomed mustache. He is allegedly 18 years old despite the fact that if someone were to introduce him to you as Matt Mitchell, 35-year old foreman on an offshore oil rig, you would not bat an eye.

Look, I’m not saying Matt Mitchell is a grown man posing as a teenager for some reason we do not yet understand. That would be a scurrilous rumor, the sort in which I do not traffic or condone.

All I’m doing is asking questions here, people.

Whatever the truth, it’s safe to say we’re all thrilled he’s here.

In just the fourth game of his college career, the forward turned in the most prolific scoring performance by an Aztec freshman since 2003. Mitchell scored 31 points, 26 of which came in the second half of SDSU’s 96-63 drubbing of Eastern Illinois.

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Game Recap: SDSU opens Dutcher era by dominating team of local ragamuffins

I always forget San Diego Christian College’s moniker, which is silly because we play these human traffic cones from Santee every single year as an early season appetizer. I’m pretty sure it’s a majestic bird of some kind, right? The San Diego Christian Embezzling Buzzards? That seems right.

Aw hell, I’ll just Google tonight’s game so I can know for sure.

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Right. The, uh, San Diego Christian Gray Crests. Got it.

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Cold beer, new faces and hella baskets: an exhibition basketball Tweetcap

The San Diego State men’s basketball team kicked off the Brian Dutcher era on Thursday night with a 98-79 win over UC San Diego. Yes, yes, I know: “Kicked off” is a stupid and embarrassing expression to use when writing about hoops, but you know what? I’m not changing it.

IT’S THE PRESEASON FOR BLOGGERS TOO. I’m here to learn from my mistakes and get better, folks.

Tonight’s game wasn’t on TV (not even the TV they have on computers these days) and I didn’t attend the contest because LOL I’m not paying $15 parking for a stupid exhibition game. So I didn’t see it. Lemonverbena had other plans, as well, and VocalMinoritySDSU lives in the Yukon Territory or somesuch. Fortunately, Attempted Chem was on the scene at State to drink beer, eat greasy Mexican food that will definitely not give him the runs and provide this handy Tweetcap for the first non-super secret fake game of the Dutcher era!

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Little Dutcher boy sticks finger in recruiting dike, becomes Dutcher Man

When our Most Revered Coaching Savior Stephen Louis Fisher retired in April after a wildly successful 18-year tenure as San Diego State head basketball coach, longtime Assistant Coach/Head Coach in Waiting Brian Dutcher finally elevated to the big chair he had waited so patiently for. Upon his long-foreshadowed ascension, one big question hung over the mesa like a cloud of bro-stank from a Pennywise mosh pit:

The question appears to have been affirmatively answered: HELLS YEAH BRAH!! Jump in the Zeigsmobile…

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